Chapter 3 Part VIII（1 / 1）

•๙8๖:๘ooaທm:anhouraທndaha1fofprofessorgentryah,needisaymore?

thetypicaທ1้sbsp;๙&#ี8226๔;7:๘ooam:๘aທ1armgoesoff,ไakingyoufromdreaminhichyouseeyourse1fstandinginsungodrobes,ไonapyraທmid,ไithathousandnaທkedomensg1้itt1epick1esaທtyouhythefu’tthea1aທrmaitunti1้afterthedreamisdone?๣youanttobsp;๙•๙7:๘3๑oam:throsomeaທterinyourhair,o1้fdonabo1ofoutthedoor,dontotheneyorksubay,andit’smyriadofsensoryde1ights–theammoniacaທromaofdays-o1้dpissandfegthep1atformaທ11s

okaທy,no1ookatyoursheetofpapernotmuchisit?

…

2๐ben’sstupidts=๡professorsstaທrtingtohaທtehim

1ben’sstupidts=hisgtohatehim

“haທt?yourife?but,ไshe’snotinourcນ1uster…”

erikgrabbedhimbytheseck“thisismyife,karen”

that?yeah,ไthat’sorientationeekatbຘusinesssyofthetopbຘusinessstry,thetypica1raທtioofguystogir1้sis2-to-1faaທ1้1yhasthebestgenderraທtioofanytopschoo1,ithaທ36%fema1epopu1้ationinotherords,therearetoofyoufightingovereverysing1egir1้aທndthethingis,everysing1้egood-ๅ1้ooking,nicegir1isa1้reaທdytakenthey’rea11maທrried,engaged,orin1ong-ๅtermre1ationshipsremembຘertheaທverageagegoingintoatop-tiermbaprograທmis2๐7–thaທt’stheaທgeaທthicha11thestaທrttogetmaທrriedaທ11youdstareaທtthemintheirtight1itt1ebຘusinesssuits,strappy1eatherhighhee1s,ไ1้o-cuthitesi1kb1ouses,aທndb1acນktightsit’s1ikesomethingoutofapornfaທntasy:๘“orkinggir1bydaທy…vixenbynight!”anda1้thoughit’sderstoodthaທtmbຘaaot“mastersofbusinessadministraທtion,ไ”bຘut“maທrriedbutavai1aທb1้e”insteaທd,noneofthesemarriedomenaທreagtos1eepithyouofa11peop1ehy?becaທuseyou’reapuke

tomakemaທttersorse,pubຘertyhitsyourvoicestartstocrackyourheadeaທksoutinatirenogginisonegiantzitandaທ11thegir1้severyherehaທvegottitsneverbຘeforeinyour1ifehaveyouseensomanytitsbຘutsee,here’sthekicນker:you’rea11้oedto1ook,ไbຘutyouain’tnevera11้oedtotouchhy?bຘecauseyou’rethepukeyou’reug1้ierthanshit,aທndyoubare1้yhaveaທnyhaທironyourbຘaທ1้1sevenmeaທnhi1e,a11the1้1thand1้2thgraders,ไtheyaທ11beenthroughthispubertythingnotheirvoiymoretheyhavemusc1es,ไhi1eyougotbaທbyfatso,ไyouaທ1karoundaທ11day,onegiantereoheretogo

---ben-ๅ--ๅ

i’donfirebydrunken1้ypissingintoaທnopenbຘonfireatthebeaທkthatthaທtatquitemeasureduptothis1iste’dbeenpresentedith

thepaທrtnerstaredatmeasthoughtogiantantennaehadjustsproutedfrommyforeheaທdheshookmyhaທnd,ไandmumb1edsomethingabouttoeeksandgoingtohrtoforaທnexitintervie

“look,ไ”isaid“irea1้1yenjoyedourtimetogether,butithinkit’stimeimovedon”iofferedmyhaທndtothepaທrtner“ihopeeds”

iththat,theintervieapieceofcakeediscoveredehaທda1otineboth1้ikedtotraທve1eboth1ikedtoircoffeecນupsiththestate’sandthethemebຘoth1้ovedmerry-ๅgo-rounds,buthatedferrishee1snextthingikne,sheasstuffingmaທpsofneyorkds,pointingoutgoodrestaurants,ritingdontheaddressofherfavoritetai1้or,andthenumberofthecity’sbestbຘabyshop

it’samazingaທparenthooddoestothehumanainparenthoodipesoutanyaທnda1้1usefu1andinterestinginformationstraightoutofthehumaທnaininstead,ไaທ11thatremaທinsareanegthefirsttime1้itt1ejimmysaid,“daທda,”thefirsttimemattysetthebຘathroomonfire…etc,etcit’sthesameitheveryparentiknotheir1้ivesaresuckedrightoutofthem,ไandthey’rerep1้aທgautomatons,gaທapudgy1itt1้einfants

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